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Wednesday, 21 February 2007

Black and White or Shades of Gray

A workshop on emotional intelligence I recently attended brought up the subject of positive outlook. The example given was if you were in a car accident, would you think yourself unlucky for getting in the accident, or lucky that you didn't get hurt? It is all a matter of perspective.

It seems to me that overweight people [women in particular] concentrate on the negative parts of being obese and the positive parts of being thin, when there are in fact two ways of looking at both scenarios. On a bad day, being skinny has more negative points than positive.

Without destroying the illusion that I am completely happy now I weigh 60 odd kilos I would like to examine my black and white / positive and negative view of the world. Here are a few random examples. The point of this exercise is to find contentment in whatever state I'm in.

~Watching the Biggest Loser
White (positive) -I'm thinner than the contestants and have never been that overweight.
Black (negative) - I am fatter than Jillian and Michelle and don't have Jillians arms.
Shades of Gray (reality) - I should be proud that I have lost 20kgs but I can still work towards a fitter, more muscular body - weight loss is not the only goal

~ Exercising every morning
White - I feel satisfied and energised after my workouts (go the endorphins!)
Black - I would love to stay in bed, read a book or have morning sex instead
Shades of Gray - it's OK to stay in bed some mornings and have vigorous sex instead of working out! (you can tell I'm away from home can't you!)

~ Food
White - I have found a way to eat most of the food I enjoy while gradually losing the last 5kg
Black - I wish I could just eat what I wanted without it making me feel like crap and making me gain weight
Shades of Gray - Sometimes I could just eat what I wanted - if I wanted!!

My perception is my reality. Living in a totally white world is unrealistic and the black world would be destructive and depressing. Today I will think in shades of gray - leaning towards the slightly overcast rather than thunder cloud gray.

I don't know where the colour comes in though - maybe it's that rush of mindless optimism that has no basis in logic or reality ...

Can you think of your examples that could do with a Photoshop grayscale filter ... ?


  1. Saw your comment on AFG -- just wanted to say that you look great and I hope you can be a little kinder to yourself. I was at goal and then regained, partly because I couldn't figure out how to fit a skinnier me into a "real life." That's the real challenge, I think.

  2. I saw your note on AFG also - I read and re-read that Fat Girl List on AFG and just couldn't really find anything (that I identified with) in there. Then I read it again and realized there were are few things in there - that I USED to think - that are mostly gone now.

    I will come back and read more (from your archives) later - just wanted to say hi.