I am home safe in the loving arms of my husband and kitty.
I am not going to write a blow by blow description of the week I've just had because ... it's over. I anticipated it would be about the physical - my appearance, eating and training and it wasn't at all. That part was easy.
It was actually more about living with people who's spiritual beliefs and practices are diametrically opposed to mine. It also finally clicked as to why I have had issues with my weight all my adult life. My parents made me easily fall into the old habits of feeling inherently worthless and an immense disappointment to them.
I tried to respond to their criticism of my life, my philosophies and my choices with love. But it was difficult. I ended up feeling more like I made things worse rather than better. I wanted to heal the misunderstandings between us, but I feel like the gap just got wider.
But I did learn some good things. I didn't revert to eating as a coping mechanism but instead exercised to find some quiet, constructive time.
I learned to be thankful for the life that I have. I also discovered that the deep connection I feel with my internet family and both old friends and new friends is a treasure beyond compare.
I learned that I am stronger now than ever before in my life. I know who I am and I am not willing to pretend to be something else just to gain approval.
And at the end of all this, I have had a sneaky look on the scales and I am confident that I will be able to report a decent loss tomorrow.
I have also been to my new gym today and done a solid NRL4W (New Rules of Lifting for Women) workout and 30 minutes of intervals on the treadmill.
Thank you for your thoughts and encouragement over the last 7 days. It really meant a lot. Miss Katie of the Indestructible is BACK.