I have been more tired than normal and have had a hideous headache for two days. I feel like crap.
The monkey voices keep shouting that I need more carbs, I need less fat, I need more cardio, I need a refeed, I need to change something because this isn't working. By 3pm today I had convinced myself that I was going to carb load tomorrow to see what would happen.
By 4pm the mystery was revealed when TOM arrived way early. Everything makes sense - the weight spike, the headache and the exhaustion. But what I am most proud of is that I stayed away from sugar and starch right through what turned out to be PMT - in fact I didn't have any cravings at all.
I do, however, think that I may still need a carb refeed so that I can continue to smash it in the gym. But I have never figured out to do it properly. After some extensive
I am going to try doing it by the book (which is rare for me) so today I logged everything including the sugar free maple syrup (full of carbs I didn't notice), DC, sugar free cordial and vanilla green tea. The goal is to keep carbs under 30g a day during the week and then eat nearly all carbs with lowish fat and protein on the weekend. You have to go 12 days straight to start with so I am on my way. I have already calculated my carb refeed day which is numerous bowls of oats and yogurt, sweet potato wedges, a magnum and rocky road which fits my macros perfectly. I am only going to do one day to start as I don't want to turn into a hungry monster. I am going to try refeeding during the week so that I don't keep walking to the shop to buy binge food.
I will keep you posted on progress. I think I mostly need a good night's sleep so I am off to see to that now. I will attempt to log each day of the experiment for your enjoyment.
DAY -1- AD
Date ... 3-Dec-2008
Weight ... 63
Fat ... 90
% ... 53
Protein ... 161
% ... 42
Carb ... 22
% ... 6
Cals ... 1539
Sometimes, when you're feeling your lowest, the real you is summoned.
And you understand, maybe for the first time ever, how grand you are, because you discover that vulnerable doesn't mean powerless, scared doesn't mean lacking in beauty, and uncertainty doesn't mean that you're lost.
These realizations alone will set you on a journey that will take you far beyond what you used to think of as extraordinary.
There is always a bright side.