When we decide to lose weight, we usually have a list of all reasons why we want to slim down. Sometimes we write out this list to provide motivation along the way.
Here are some of my reasons
♥ to have more confidence
♥ to improve my self esteem
♥ to be free from the issues I have with food
♥ to feel more sexually attractive
♥ to be less critical of myself
♥ to be happier and more content
Well, I have some bad news – weight loss alone can never bring these sorts of results. And when weight loss doesn’t bring these things, we feel cheated, disappointed usually as we approach our goal.
The only direct and immediate benefit of losing weight is that you’ll be healthier and a smaller size. Reaching your goal weight does not mean that you will love what you see in the mirror, that you will feel proud of what you have accomplished or that you will be free from the misery of self doubt, insecurity and life’s frustrations.
This is a harsh truth but makes so much sense. The rewards I expected when I reached competition weight never materialised and I felt cheated. What was the point of all that discipline and effort when the only tangible outcome was that I didn’t have any clothes that fitted me? I still felt I was carrying too much fat, I had ugly loose skin, I felt less sexually attractive because I had no breasts or curves, and my muscles were smaller than everyone else’s. I so wanted to be happy, proud and content when I reached my goal to stand on stage in a bikini but I never got the payoff I expected. Is it little wonder that it took months for me to recover from a destructive post comp starve/binge cycle?
Following a healthy nutrition and exercise program can help deliver some of the rewards you are after – a sense of accomplishment, confidence to be more physically active, an improvement in general physical well being which may increase your happiness – but being thin [or muscular and shredded] will not make any substantial difference to the life you are living right now.
The only way to get the benefits I listed as my ‘reasons’ is to work on my issues one day at a time. I can learn how to stop bingeing (or wanting to binge), learn that “it’s just food”, learn how to like what I see in the mirror every day, learn that people cherish and appreciate me no matter what I look like and learn how to turn off the harsh criticising voice in my head.
Losing weight is a fantastic goal. It will make you healthy. It won’t, by itself, increase your happiness or improve your life. Don’t expect it to, and you won’t be disappointed.
Oh so true!
ReplyDeleteOnce again Katie, you write a post that strikes a chord with me. I got to my goal weight, which was great, but I hadn't dealt with the issues that made me overweight in the first place. I am now finally seeing a professional to deal with my depression/anxiety brought about by a extremely low (and was getting lower) self-esteem. Thanks so much for your insightful blogging- while I'm not in the best place to be blogging myself, I get so much motivation and strength from your blog :)
ReplyDeleteI think that's why it's important to practice these things on the way down and enjoy the learning along the way.
ReplyDeleteI don't ever remember being happy and content, loving how I look and my life at this weight before so I'm definately heading in the right direction and making progress on the mind issues each and every day.
What a fantastic post....so important for people to understand that you have to work on your inside as well as the outside or else you will NEVER be happy with the outside.
ReplyDeleteBeing content has so much to do with your spiritual well being.
Thank you so much for sharing!
Jess