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Saturday, 28 July 2007

Does it normally do that?

Things you don't want to hear at the hairdressers "...does it normally do that?"

Today I got my hair cut and coloured. I have been attempting to grow my hair long but it has just got altogether too daggy. I reverted to my previous chin length bob and feel much happier with it. I am continuing to grow out my fringe so it's a bit different.

While getting the foils taken out of my hair, the apprentice said to the senior hairdresser "does it normally do that?" There was no answer to the question so I assume there was some frantic sign language or facial expressions along the line of "shut up in front of the client".

I got a special complimentary conditioning treatment because my hairdresser had to stop and cut some bloke's hair in between my colour and cut. Or maybe to counteract the previously mentioned undisclosed chemical faux pas? Let me state for the record that the enjoyment of a head massage is inversely proportionate to the excruciating pain your neck experiences being bent over backwards at the shampoo sink. After a while, you just want to shout "would you fuckin stop compressing the vertebrae my neck before I have a cerebral hemorrhage!"

I am also not a great fan of the inane banter of the hairdressing salon. No, I am not going out tonight. No, I haven't been to the latest nightclub in Kings Cross. No, I don't love that song on the radio.

In case you haven't noticed, I am a 42 year old mature woman who gets her hair coloured to cover the grey, and cut to prevent appearing 52. I find conversation with my 18 year old hairdresser akin to being stuck in the Big Brother house indefinitely.

I pay a hell of a lot of money to have a simple haircut and a few foils. I would rather you didn't try to discuss the latest Paris Hilton escapade with me. Could I just sit here quietly and have a wee rest?

I look and feel better with my new (old) hairstyle, but somehow the trauma of visiting the hairdressing salon takes some of the enjoyment away.

God, I am a grumpy old bitch!


  1. I get to the hairdressers and say "I want this done to my hair, and I would like to just sit here and be left in peace, OK?".. they know me well! I can't stand the anal questions, the endless chit chat etc!!! I know they don't really give a shit about the answers, so don't ask me! Oh and I take my own drink too! so they don't even have to ask me would I like a watered down revolting coffee. So I am not NICE at all !

  2. You look 32 love - snaps to you. I totally agree. I'm a pigmy (only 5'1) which means my feet sometimes don't even touch the floor while I crane backwards and lift my arse off the chair to get my head high enough. They are designed by enterprising physiotherapists.

  3. LOL! I feel your pain. I am 29 and can't stand the chit chat either - it is not an age thing! It is about taking time out to be pampered for a couple of hours without being bothered by irrelevant questions.

  4. I actually like chatting with my hairdresser....but I've also been going to her for 10 years! And...she's only a few years younger than me.

    I stopped coloring my hair and let the gray out just recently. I'm pretty close to 100% gray....I'm 53. I've been this way for at least 5 years (I started going gray in my teens).

    I love getting the shampoo and massage....but you'd think by now someone would have invented a less painful sink!!