Let's be clear about why I am still comparing myself to my competition weight.
I realised that I wasn't nearly lean enough to compete and I placed last in both my divisions. After taking inspiration from Charlotte I need to aim for a competition weight in the low 50's.
If I am to compete again on 5 October, I want to control the amount of weight I need to lose and therefore shorten the dieting phase of prep.
If I weigh 57 kilos, then it will take 14 weeks to get to 50 kilos because I know I only average 1/2 kilo loss a week. Clearly if I can "maintain" for a few weeks at 55-56, it means I only have to diet for 10-12 weeks.
I am not, right at this moment, trying to maintain my "competition" weight, dear friends, because I never got there. I was 4-5 kilos above it. So the weight I was on 25 May is about as much as I should be in the off season - hence my desire to remain here.
I am working out hard in the gym but all I am aiming for is to get some bigger shoulders in the next few weeks. Everything is there, it was just still hidden under the fat. Until I can meet with my trainer and get a proper program (the downside of having a real trainer is trying to synchronise schedules), I am having 2 rest days a week to encourage muscle growth/maintenance and I've reduced my cardio to 5 days instead of 6.
My goal is to look better in my next competition than I did in my first. And most of that comes down to getting leaner and harder. I have had my 3 weeks of over stimulating my metabolism with heaps of calories. I am now on the straight and narrow.
I am following my plan to adjust calories according to what I weigh in the morning, I am eating heaps of CLEAN food and I am keeping my carbohydrates and calories high for as long as I can.
I have a clearly defined goal and putting on any more weight is not going to accomplish it. There is only 16 weeks to go. I have to make every moment count.