It is very late on Friday night and I am confessing to my fellow Pirates and relinquishing a Skinny Bone.I have eaten a fair amount of crappy food tonight. It has not been a full blown binge by my standards, so I am clinging to the comforting thought that something (some restraint) is better than nothing (no restraint).
I am uncertain as to why tonight I had a meltdown. Perhaps it was the low calories/low carb over the past 12 days but I had some carbs last night (pasta at a restaurant) and I was fine.
Anyway ... why doesn't matter ... I am drawing a line in the sand, sucking up my mistake and starting afresh in the morning. I am so good at dishing out advice to other people but I continue to find it extremely difficult to practice what I preach.
I still don't know how to find a deficit that gives me gradual fat loss without leaving me starving, exhausted and prone to rebound overeating just to ease the constant gnawing hunger and empty hole in my stomach.
I am grateful that I have you, my 'crew', to keep me honest and on track. The last thing I want is to lie or to avoid mentioning what is going on in my life/head. Today has been shit - not as shit as in the past, so I guess that's progress.
if you were to never fail, you would never be able to feel the joy of overcoming an obstacle. it is very hard to find the perfect balance to maintain the leanness you want without always losing, or without gaining, but it takes practice, just like everything else. We have to practice to perfect our diet to what works for us individually. Look at your failures as an opportunity to grow. Although every binge may seem the same, you learn something new with each one. And when it is hard to see that, you have your crew to help you back up :)
ReplyDeletep.s. the almond butter fairy and peanut butter fairy are joining our ship! :)
if you feel you need to drop a bone, so be it, you know you will reclaim in a really short time. Ez
ReplyDeleteYep we are all prone to little mistakes, but we get back up and move forward with the goal in mind. Your crew are here to boost you back up and give lovely words of encouragement, just like you have to all of us.
ReplyDeleteRecognition and being accountable (such as our blogging) of what we do is just proof that are journeys are going in the right direction, for the better.
Nerd Girl, Es and Rachael
ReplyDeleteThank you so much for your kind words.
Aside from everything else, I am remembering how a few words from a 'stranger' can make all the difference. You have made me feel so much better already.
It is ridiculous the amount of pressure we put on ourselves to be 'good', to be 'perfect', to be in 'control'. I forget that I am human too, and perfection is not required.
Here's to a better day today
♥
PS the almond butter fairy and peanut butter fairy had better behave themselves!!
I'm glad you feel better Katie, we are not robots and can't program everything all the time at least we are aware and we don't surrender, we keep going!!
ReplyDeleteI CAN SO RELATE TO THIS POST! I'm so grateful to know that I'm not alone. I'm too exhausted to post any long respone, just know that you gave voice to all I've been feeling the past couple days.
ReplyDelete